Tracy Schorn

Chump Lady is the name of my blog. I call it an online infidelity resource. I don’t write much about myself. This is not one of those personal struggles with an unfaithful partner diaries. Nor am I offering services as a shrink, lawyer, shaman, or life coach. My authority on this topic comes from lived experience. I was once chumped by a sociopath, a man with a double life spanning decades.

Chump Lady is the wisdom I wish I had the day I woke up in bed with another woman’s thong stuck to me. Chumps are constantly told, by therapists, news articles, and even people related to them, that they “contributed” to their partner’s cheating. They’re told that the cheater made a mistake or didn’t intend to hurt them. They’re shamed into believing they must be held accountable for not making the cheater “happy” and should “own” their failings in not “meeting their partner’s needs.” They’re made to believe they didn’t try hard enough, didn’t have enough sex, or that you are somewhat stale or boring. And truth told, it’s hard work not to cheat on a chump.

Many years after my own nightmare of being chumped, when I was happily ensconced in my new life, I decided to share my lessons learned online. My hope was that I might shorten someone else’s learning curve and spare them extended pain.