So, as Christopher & Heather finished recording the last episode, talking about historian Gerder Lerner’s book “The Creation of Patriarchy,” the conversation just kept on rolling along with the microphone still live. In our “private” chat, we lamented a disturbing link that ties the domestic relegation of women to the advent of slavery—heady stuff. We even tackle the toughest question of them all: what is womanhood in a world dominated by the will and needs of men?

Patriarchy has never been a secret; it’s right in our face from birth to death. Maybe that’s why we don’t talk about it. Most men hear the word Patriarchy and associate it with women’s liberation or feminism and summarily dismiss it as irrelevant to their own experiences. On the other hand, women either believe that Patriarchy is a natural consequence of biological differences between women and men or that Patriarchy is a social injustice that must be smashed. What we don’t hear is how Women’s Sexuality was used to engender man’s Patriarchy.

Is it true? It is literally impossible to be a woman. Are you beautiful and smart but still think you’re not good enough? Do you need to be extraordinary but still feel you’re doing it all wrong? Is staying young, pretty, and thin the expectation, even when age says different? Is being the good girl your ideal, so you can’t be rude, selfish, show off, fail, show fear, and never step out of line? Does being a woman mean tying yourself into knots just to be noticed or liked? Is it all too contradictory? Are you the victim? But how does staying the victim keep you from becoming the beautiful, smart woman who is enough? That’s our conversation in this episode.

Kathy Caprino was a marketing executive who rose to the VP level after 18 years in corporate life. A life that included surviving sexual harassment, gender discrimination, toxic colleagues, narcissistic bosses, and zero work-life balance. Kathy confides that, in the end, she didn’t feel valued or like someone making a positive contribution to the world. Things changed with “Finding Brave,” a philosophy and a business brand that highlights her career as a leadership coach, writer, speaker, executive trainer, and educator dedicated to the advancement of women in business. Check out Kathy’s latest book, The Most Powerful You: 7 Bravery-Boosting Paths to Career Bliss that guides women into taking the reins to achieve the rewards, respect, and authority they have earned.

We have no reason to be obsessed with Barbie, but since seeing the movie, we’ve been finding deeper and deeper messages between the lines. The latest is good boys vs bad boys. Is there a lesson to be learned from women choosing bad boys like Ken — after his conversion to the patriarch — while ignoring nice guys like Allen who support women and their struggle to be free of the patriarch? It’s an interesting dichotomy. For women to say they want to be free of subjugation, indifference, and persecution in the patriarchy while choosing men who disrespect, exploit, or abuse them, as bad boys are reputed to do? Listen in to this fascinating conversation.

How might your partner, or potential future partner, react if you asked him to see the Barbie movie with you? Since the movie’s debut, women have used the “Barbie ask” as a litmus test for evaluating compatible Kens. Is he considerate, open-minded, or empathetic? But what if your partner shuts you down before asking why this movie is important to you? Considering the complexity of relationships, judging a man over a Barbie movie might seem over the top, but who says small tests can’t give important hints about the true character of a potential life partner?

“It is literally impossible to be a woman.” So begins the monologue that breaks the women of Barbieland out of their patriarchal trance and back into power over a world they created. That dialogue reminds Christopher and Heather of why we created VBB Podcast and continue to host conversations that connect women to sources of their strength, even in a man-made world. Spoiler alert, in this episode, we highlight some of the messages in the Barbie Movies we believe translate to women’s empowerment in this world.

Kate Brookes (a.k.a. Transister Mom) is an award-winning TV reporter/anchor turned producer/filmmaker who is also mom to one 13-year-old son and one 13-year-old transgender daughter. Kate’s story is chronicled in her book, Transistor: Raising Twins in a Gender-Bending World, which is a key resource for parents of a trans child. Her key message for any parent is to remember that your primary support is to be protective. Don’t burden your trans child with educating you.